10 Untold Reasons Elon Musk Absolutely Needs Me

Reason 1: I Have a PhD in Tweeting

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Reason 2: I Can Give Mars a Makeover

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Reason 3: I Can Bench Press a SPACEX Rocket (Almost)

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Reason 4: I’m a Certified Meme Specialist

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Reason 5: My Dog Understands Tesla Better Than I Do

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Reason 6: I Perfected the Art of Using a Wand, Microphone, and Flamethrower Simultaneously

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Reason 7: I Once Fasted for 24 Hours... By Accident

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Reason 8: I Can Speak Fluent Gibberish – Adored by Aliens and CEOs

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Reason 9: My Collection of Ties Includes Zero Boring Ones

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Reason 10: I Can Control Drones with My Mind... If They Are Broken

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